A Testimony of Hope For the Abused

          By Patti Willis

          [Girl]

          I was sexually abused when I was a child,
          at the age of 5 or 6, then at 13,
          and then sold into prostitution, by my first husband.

          I know that feeling of fear and
          looking over my shoulder
          because of people stalking me.

          I have hid out next to the
          Canadian border and lived in turmoil,
          looking at each car that passed,
          wondering if my fears would soon come to light.

          We need to share our feelings with at least someone else,
          because when feelings are suppressed,
          one becomes depressed and then comes destruction.

          From a history like mine,
          suppressing feelings could be very dangerous.
          Yes, we have God to turn to,
          but most humans need another human to vent to,
          otherwise why would God have realized that
          Adam needed another human to talk with.
          Adam had God closer than any other
          human on earth,
          but God knew humans need seeing, feeling,
          touching, sharing, holding, etc.
          So He gave him Eve.

          I do know that God is stronger and mightier than any
          way Satan can possibly be, so there will be victory,
          but it may take some time.
          These kinds of situations do not get solved in any quick manner, normally.
          But with God, all things are possible.

          I feel I need to share the following.
          As a matter of fact,
          I am crying knowing that it will touch someone’s heart.

          [Flowers]

          "HOPE"

          Lying on a bed at night,
          crying until your eyes are red, swollen,
          and unable to shed another tear.
          Not able to see any glint of light
          at the end of the tunnel.
          Seeing the last piece of ledge breaking out
          from underneath your feet.
          Wondering if there is really any hope at all.
          Feeling that it would be better
          if God would let you not wake up.

          It Looks Hopeless..
          It Feels Hopeless..
          But, it isn’t Hopeless

          IF

          You have God.

          There have been many times in my past that I could not
          see any light around me or ahead of me.
          All I felt was despair and pain.
          I felt worthless, hopeless, and even helpless.

          I understand what it feels like to have everything going
          wrong and what it feels like to have almost all of my earthly
          possessions, self-esteem, and dignity stripped away.

          I know the pain from physical, sexual, emotional, and mental
          abuse. God even allowed me to go through the "Valley of the
          Shadow of Death" (Psalm 23:4).

          During one of the abusive situations I was experiencing,
          I remember standing in the bathroom facing the mirror.
          I envisioned myself holding onto a thin thread
          and knew if I loosened my grip in the slightest,
          that would be the end of my sanity.

          But God knew better than I,
          that things would look better tomorrow or shortly there after.

          Looking back on that experience,
          I realize that the thread I was holding onto was a Scarlet Thread.
          It was the only life line I had at that time.
          I know now that if I keep my eyes focused on my Heavenly Father,
          I see the Light,
          there is joy,
          there is strength,
          and there definitely is hope.
          I now have more than a rope to hang onto.

          Psalm 31:24 says, "Be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart.
          All you who hope in the Lord" (NKJ).

          So don’t give up, just give it to Him!

          ~~Patti~~

          [Flowers]

          "I will not forget my promises"
          I will hold your hand,
          Oh, my child don’t be afraid
          For have I not said
          I will be with you always.

          You are my sweet sweet child
          And I love you,
          I will not forget my promises to you.

          I am Jesus
          Please stay by my side
          Let me hold you in my arms
          Where you can safely hide

          I will make you strong
          Like a tower you will stand
          I will not forget my promises to you

          Patti ‘84’

          (this is one of the songs on my album,
          that God gave me when I was going through a lot of pain)

          ~~Patti Willis~~

          [Flowers]

          ~~A little more about me . . .

          At the age of five, I received Jesus into my heart.
          I had a very dynamic relationship with God
          and I walked very close to God as a child.

          I married into a Missionary family,
          at the age of sixteen, thinking
          this was the beginning of my ministry for God.
          Little did I know, that the person I married
          was not at all a Christian.

          Unfortunately, I became more concerned with survival
          than seeking what God’s will was for me.
          After many years of every kind of abuse, my marriage ended.

          Although, I tried many times to serve God,
          I became very discouraged because of hurts in my life.

          It was not until 1984 when I woke up
          and realized my life was not
          going in the right direction.

          As I totally surrendered my life back
          to God, He restored my life,
          the gifts, and talents that
          He had given me for His use.

          Oh yes, I have made mistakes,
          but God has been and is faithful
          and just to forgive them all.

          I met a wonderful person in 1990,
          who became my spouse in 1992.
          Since then, my husband and I have sought to do
          God’s will in ministering in any
          way He has placed before us.

          God has given me the gift to
          minister through songs, and poetry.

          * * *

          I hope that this page has brought some hope to you
          and made you feel that with God
          anything is possible.

          * * *

          ~~More~~