One of the wonders of heaven is that we will have an increased capacity for love. Couples will be many times more in love with each other than they ever were on earth. In comparison, their earthly love will seem as tame as a ‘romance’ between five-year-olds. And yet the astounding thing is that everyone else in heaven will thrill this former couple as utterly as they thrill each other. Everyone will be so head-over-heels in love with everyone else as to render unthinkable an exclusive relationship such as marriage.

In heaven you will have unbelievable closeness with people of both genders. Everyone will beam with delight to see you. No one will be the slightest reserved, shy, snobbish or prejudiced. You will feel connected, understood and accepted like no one on earth has ever experienced. The warmth, intimacy and depth of eternal relationships will be literally out of this world. It is my conviction that the mental clarity we will enjoy means no one will ever be tongue-tied or left groping for words. This, combined with increased understanding, emotional wholeness, transparent honesty and divine love will make deep, intimate communication effortless. Heavenly relationships will be so much more fulfilling than earthly ones that for anyone in heaven to want marriage would be like an adult wanting a pacifier.

Heaven will be the place where dreams come true – where the honeymoon never ends and where people are more exciting and loving and perfect than we dare hope. And that’s just each other. The joy we will find in Jesus is indescribable.

There will be marriage in heaven – our marriage to the Son of God. It is then that our love for Jesus will be consummated in eternal bliss, bringing us to realms of exquisite joy and never-ending fulfillment.

Once, when I was thinking of those who have happy marriages, out of thin air came the words, ‘They have received their reward in full.’ These are the words of Jesus spoken about those who receive the little, earthly pleasures that many of us hanker after but will miss out on heavenly rewards (Matthew 6:2,5,16). The way this came to me implied not the slightest criticism of those blessed with marital happiness, it is just some people are rewarded in this life and some are rewarded in the life to come, and those who are rewarded down here end up with the least.

In the age to come the huge reversals promised by Jesus will take place. The last will be first. The downtrodden will be exalted. Not only will beggars like Lazarus in Jesus’ parable (Luke 16:19-28) find themselves in heaven, and many who had lived in luxury find themselves in hell, but even among the born again there will be a vast range of different rewards, depending upon how we have lived this life (1 Corinthians 3:12-15; Galatians 6:7-8; Matthew 12:36-37). Every believer who has missed out on companionship, romance, marital happiness, having children or whatever, will be extravagantly compensated. What had previously seemed sacrifices will turn out to have been the most cunning investments. Not only will every tear will be dried, but sorrow will be swallowed up by uncontrollable, never-ending joy. The only regret will be over not having sacrificed more.

One of the many shocks awaiting us is that when all is revealed it will turn out that the ones to be envied are those whose reward is limited to the next life. They will receive many times more than those who currently seem happiest, provided they do not lose some of their eternal compensation by having the wrong attitude while on earth, such as resenting God for deferring their reward. The wait builds within us spiritual treasures – such as greater faith – that nothing else could achieve.

There are those who have happiness down here, and there are those who surrender that happiness so that they can invest it in superior, future happiness. Missing out on earthly joys is like sacrificing much to invest $10,000 in a heavenly bank account, and in the next life being able to withdraw it as a $1 billion.

A huge handicap most of us face – and this is certainly true of me most of the time – is that we are so earthly-minded that we cannot so much as imagine any heavenly reward that could even equal – much less surpass – the marriage of our dreams. Despite our weak imaginations, however, such rewards exist and they can be yours. Scriptures such as the following hint at the magnitude of heaven’s compensation for what we might miss out down here, but it is beyond description.

Romans 8:18 I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.

1 Peter 4:13 But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.

2 Corinthians 4:17 For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. (18) So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

We intensify our torment by daydreaming, wishful thinking or pining for earthly gratification. We are not intentionally cruel to ourselves, it is just that, like a drug, the very thing that offers fleeting comfort, inflames our frustration. In the long run it will turn out much more fulfilling to follow Scripture’s advice:

Colossians 3:2 Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.

The damage done by longing for earthly gratification can be repaired by developing a deeper longing for the Lord. Displace fleshly yearnings with spiritual yearnings. Not only will this lower our frustration, it will foster a desire that will propel us forward spiritually. Moreover, even though continually thinking this way is far from easy, it is simply getting our thoughts to line up with reality.

This side of heaven, being in love is an exciting high interspersed with inevitable disappointments, misunderstandings, frustration, and hurt. It might be nicer than being single but it is an elusive shadow of what our heart pines for. Built into our very being is a craving for perfection that nothing on earth can supply. Heaven alone offers the perfection we yearn for. There you will find superior excitement, superior satisfaction, superior intimacy, superior oneness – superior everything, with no downside.

If owning a brand new Ferrari causes a toy peddle car to lose some of its appeal, heavenly pleasures outclass the best that earthly romance offers. What we now think is the ultimate in red-blooded passion, thrilling adventure and heart-thumping excitement will be seen as boring child-play, once we taste the wonders of heaven.

Do you think the Creator of sex has reached his limit in his ability to give us pleasure and fulfillment? Do you suppose that in the infinity of the Almighty’s loving wisdom he has reserved for our heavenly reward that which is second rate relative to what he has already given fallen humanity? There is a spiritual ecstasy of which the highest sexual experience, the greatest romance, the most exciting adventure is but the faintest shadow. There are exquisite sensations and rapturous delights that so exhilarate, intoxicate and transport every fiber of one’s being that our present bodies and emotions would explode if subjected them. Pinnacles of pleasure beyond our dreams all revolve around loving and adoring Almighty God. Every Christian is destined for them. All we need do is remain faithful in this life, allowing ourselves to be captivated by the beauty of Jesus.

For anyone to lament there being no sex in heaven is like lamenting that there will be no Barbie Dolls. Everything wonderful that anyone has ever experienced on earth will be raised so many levels that so-call adult pleasures will pale in the same way as we currently look back on what seemed the most important thing on earth when we were four years old. If we keep our eyes on Jesus, mind-boggling things are ahead!

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